Friday, July 29, 2011

The wife I planned to be

Yesterday we had the privilege of attending the wedding of a wonderful couple from our church. Few things compare to observing firsthand the sheer joy of a godly couple on their wedding day; all the love they have for each other finally culminating in life-binding vows before God and His people, all the hopes they have for the future they will spend together, the plans they have to build a family and a home together. It really is a sacred, holy, and joyous sight to behold.

We've had the opportunity to attend many weddings (10?) in our 3+ years of marriage (I guess we're at the age when all our friends are getting married!) and at each one, I have been reminded of the wife I planned to be.

Our wedding day
 I Mary Jo, take you Ben, to be my lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold, from this day forward, for better or worse, for rich or for poor, in prosperity and in adversity, in sickness and in health, to love, honor and to obey, to keep myself pure unto you alone, until death parts us.

When I said those vows to Ben on May 10, 2008, I meant them with every fiber of my being. There was nothing more I wanted than to be Ben Murch's wife and spend the rest of my life by his side--if we were poor, or if we were rich, if we had trying times or easy times. I was going to love him, honor him, and obey him no matter what Above that, I was going to keep a perfect house, get dressed beautifully every day (including doing my hair and make-up!). I was going to have dinner ready when he walked in the door every night (and I would certainly never resort to take-out or frozen pizza). I was never going to nag, complain, or argue and I was going to change every diaper and give every bath without asking for his help. I was going to love him faithfully, tenderly, perfectly for all the days God gave us together.

Obviously some of my expectations were unrealistic (who puts make-up on every day? Besides, Ben honestly doesn't care if I wear make-up every day, or even most days). But my desires were pure and God-honoring. In this life God has given me, my number one calling above all others is to be Ben's helper, lover, and friend. When God was knitting me together in my mother's womb, He was doing it with Ben in mind. All throughout my life, God was shaping me for this task of being Ben's wife.

All too often, it's easy to forget that. It's easy to nag, complain, and stress about the little (and big) things, forgetting that God has chosen me for the task of being Ben's wife. Ben has chosen me out of all the women in the world to be the one he spends his life with, and has faithfully loved and served me these past three years.

So, I'm thankful for another couple united to the glory of God (and finally another married couple our age at church!) and another reminder to aspire to be the wife God has called me to be. Even though I'll never be the perfect wife, I need to commit to making my role as wife my number one passion and pursuit for the rest of my days, to the glory of God. Who's with me?


  1. :) I loved this post MJ! Totally am with you on this one. I remember getting married and thinking it would just be a fairy tale from start to finish. But, oh how wrong I was. My marriage to Caleb has been such a wonderful blessing and such a difficult road. There was and is so much we *both* have to learn and lay down on the altar to truly bring glory to Christ in our marriage! :D loved this post!!

  2. This is so true! I needed this reminder! Thank you for sharing Mary Jo- you're such an encouragement! Love you!

  3. Your mom's with you! Thanks Mary Jo.

  4. Amiga, this post was for me! Praise God I so needed to read this. Now I'll work heartily onto the Lord! Col 3:23