Yesterday was a hard day for me.
I was up a lot during the night with a teething baby. I was awake early. The quick breakfast I had planned ended up taking an hour and a half of hands-on time (long story). I spent the day exhausted, unmotivated, and grumpy--and, of course, nauseous on occasion. I didn't get to take a nap and my mother's helper (who usually comes on Thursdays and helps me around the house and/or with the kids) wasn't able to come.
The children weren't bad. They played sweetly and napped well. But, I was just exhausted and feeling overwhelmed. I think I broke down and cried three different times over the course of the afternoon.
Finally it hit me that I really just needed an attitude adjustment. While Katie was watching a DVD and Benjamin was still sleeping, I fixed a cup of my midwife's pregnancy tea blend (with hibiscus in it--which makes it so delicious!) and spent some time reading the Bible.
God's word was such a balm for my weary mama heart yesterday. I came away refreshed and with a much better attitude than I started out with.
I did have one more emotional moment when Ben got home from work but he was so kind--and even suggested that we have cereal for dinner. I didn't go with that option (trying to make sure I get enough protein into my pregnant self!), but he did clean the kitchen after we ate which was a huge blessing.
Last night was worse than the night before. Poor Benjamin's little teeth just don't want to break through, it seems.
When I became a mother, I signed away my "right" to lots of personal leisure and a guaranteed good night's sleep. I knew I was in for a life of sacrifice for little people who probably won't fully appreciate what I do until they welcome their own little people into the world.
But you know? I'm not in this because it's fun (though most days it truly is). I chose this life because raising up the next generation of Christ-followers is a truly important work. God gave me these babies and called me to this ministry. And you know? It's going to be totally, 100% worth it.
The world may view what I do as a menial work--wiping noses, soothing teething babies, reading stories, playing with toys, carrying babies around in my belly for 9 months out of every two years or so.
But, they're wrong. The world can have its temporary pleasures and overwhelming mess of stuff. I want what matters forever, for eternity--even if it means trading off many of the convenience and fleeting niceties the world has to offer.